I am not a hipster dufus and I don't play one on TV

Reminiscent of the Seinfeld episode, we got lost in the parking garage today.  This occured after work, when we tried to leave the gym.

Walking to the elevators we realized that neither of us remembered, or even took the time to remember, how far up the parking garage my car traveled. Looking at each other, it was evident a crusade that can only be achieved on a television sit-com was upon us.

But to our favor, we were fairly certain my car was on one of only four levels. It was finally after numerous visits to each floor (yes we actually over looked my car the first time around) that I found it.

We make one special couple, Taiece said to me during one of our quick elevator stints.  *Yes, it's true, only if you the reader actually knew.*

Part II


Luckily, all went smoothly and we were able to get home. However not before having to go all the way back to the gym to validate our parking pass I forgot to bring on the first trip in. Soon enough we were in the comforting confines of our apartment, just in time to break m'lady's door mirror down in our storage closet.

puddles, not snow

I stepped outside tonight to recycle a couple of early Christmas boxes and was in awe.

"Wow," I thought as I looked off at a lighted church above the tree tops. "I am actually here -- smelling this Pacific Northwest air... Cool. Literally."

Although it is late December and houses are brightly illuminated in whites, greens, and reds, the ground lay clear of holiday snow. There are puddles instead.

I am okay with that. 

Temperatures are warmer than my 25 previous Christmases have ever been and I am okay with that because the shopping centers are decorated, playing holiday music while shoppers pack the check-out lines and parking lots. 

I know the holiday season is nigh because once again, I am anticipating Christmas morning. You don't lose that, I think.

This walk was a good idea

There is a ravine in my neighborhood.

When I first heard of this wooded park, I wasnt sure what to expect -- maybe a flat, grassy area with kids pulling their mom around the swing set.

I couldnt have been more wrong.

Without being too loquacious in such a description, it was fascinating. It felt surreal --like I was in Jurassic Park, and I liked it!

The multitude of towering, skinny trees criss- cross each other in a tangled net, each trying to reach the sky first in a friendly battle.

As I walked down the hill I see the trees are complemented with a small stream, birds above my head, and a curious and not very timid squirrel. Through the gaps in the trees, a pink and purple sunset.


We pushed through the other end of the ravine. My index finger couldnt snap the button on my camera enough. I didnt want to leave this place.

[archive reprint] Cowabunga says it all

Original posted Oct. 16, 2009
It's amazing the comfort that familiarity brings when, at times, you may feel like a fish out of water.

Sometimes you may find it is the simplest of sounds, smells, sights, or items lying around the apartment.
Tonight this amenity was the guitar, pages of a novel; some defining music, a bowl of mac n' cheese, and... as of this very moment, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - the movie.
Perhaps I am not out of water at all. I have just swam to the next pond.

other thoughts:

• Does April O'neal get laid off from her news station in the year 2008?
• With today's green push, would it be a law that the Shredder has to recycle his metal spike-wear when he's done with it?
• It's amazing how real these turtles looked back in the late 80's. Why did we switch everything to CGI, it takes the imagination out of the art.

Jelly Bean War

You can forget how good a jelly bean is, but you will not forget the scarring sensations of eating baby powder, rotten eggs, or some sweetened skunk spray.

This my friends was Jelly Bean Wars -- a not so auspicious challenge.

Lounging around last week, awaiting my departure from Milwaukee and looking for some entertainment, I looked up at my cousin and made her a proposal:  "Gabrielle, will you eat a black jelly bean if I promise to eat a black jelly bean too?"

Before I could finish asking the question, she retorted with sure displeasure.
"Why?" you, the reader, might ask.
Well, because it wasn't just any black jelly bean of licorice flavor that she may be ingesting, there was a chance it was the ever-undesirable sensation of Skunk Spray.

Oh yes, this wasn't an ordinary box of jelly beans, it was a box filled with beads of wrongfully flavored sugar presented in the form of boogers, vomit, ear wax, pencil shavings, moldy cheese, rotten egg, black pepper, and the consensual disgust of the night -- Baby wipes.

However it wasn't that easy. The fun was this; you didn't know which flavor you were eating.

There were eight different colors of jelly beans. Each color could either be a regular flavored peach, pear, banana, etc., or it could unknowingly be it's counterpart like the all too realistic tasting "vomit", "booger", and "pencil shavings", respectively.

So, still starving for some action that evening, I knew I had to crank up the challenge on my end by making sure I would put myself in a "lose-lose" situation, giving her some incentive, and hopefully having some laughs.

She accepted so benevolently. The agreed verbal contract was this:  We each eat one black jelly bean (either licorice or skunk spray).  If she discovered she was chewing skunk spray, then I had to also eat a second jelly bean that was potentially Vomit flavor (the yellow and red one), and extremely disgusting, in addition to my original black jelly bean.

And so it goes...

Would you take the risk?  Do the flavors of Skunk Spray deter you from anything resembling this challenge? Or do you take on the challenge for a little family fun?
Did Gabrielle accept my challenge, and if so, did I want to actually partake knowing the flavors that present themselves...?

Think about it, and check back later for the video result.

Good morning world

Through the window I watch the sunrise.  Seated as comfortably as I can in this oft-used airport seat, I await my flight listening to the little girl from the family next to me gaze in awe and excitement as the metallic vehicles come and go to the sky.
A small explosion of dust, probably tire particles and concrete, erupts as a plane just hit ground.
I am tired, but will be home in about 12 hours.

Anticipation still overwhelms my brain, but mainly my lungs and stomach. I try to sit comfortable in these seats.

I shouldn't be in angst. This is the end of my third trip in the past seven months. When all is said and done, I will have visited eight airports and sat on 12 different planes.  I am getting used to it and have come a far way since I swore off flying forever in 2001 after my initial trip to Florida. It has taken 8 years and maybe I am starting, finally, to enjoy the thrill of travel.

Noise fills the space behind me as the gate's waiting area grows. In front of me the sun has just peeked through the morning clouds.  The world is waking up.

It is time for me to join.

Beers, deer[s], and a monster [burger]

This was the scene at about 8p.m. last Saturday. From the looks on our faces, you probably wouldn't guess what we had just gone through. Or should you?

There was a weekend waiting for me. A continuing tradition from my childhood. The annual family deer hunt -- something I knew I didnt want to miss because I simply couldnt. I would never hear the end of it if I did.

It begins a while back. After a half year of nothing but nebulous, anticipative planning concerning my move west, it was finally in September when the script was written -- I knew I was coming back to Wisconsin for the state deer hunt opening weekend.

Remember those childhood memories the night before Christmas, the moments before buying your first car to freedom, and the restless butterflies in your stomach before that very first date.  Wrap them all up into one very warm sleeping bag, and try to sleep. I challenge you.  This is, and always has, defined me during what has become one of the last remaining countryside activities in my back pocket. For those of us from this state; we know what a craze the sport becomes as the woods and roadside transform orange and the hunters themselves become a deer in rut.

This year, however, deer camp was changed. Because we stayed in a new campground, we also found some new northwoods dining at a place called "The Mug", home of something so large and so life altering that I cant believe many have walked into this place and left the same person. My audience, I present to you, The Monster Burger.

This succulent medley of every traditional topping that takes atop the tremendous one-pound patty of beef is no doubt a challenge to any, but also a feat and competition to others. This night, all was the case.

Check it -- Bacon, mushrooms, ham, cheese, tomatoes, onions, an apparent whole head of lettuce, ketchup, mustard, barbecue sauce and mayonnaise team up with this pound of meat to create one barbaric sandwich, my friends.

I first heard of this story several weeks back after my youngest brother managed to force every little bite into his big mouth...finishing the dinner meant to serve a family.

This weekend, two more challengers came to the table, me and my other brother Chris.  Mono a mono. Could we both make this greasy goodness disappear into the lower depths of our soon to be dying stomachs?....I thought so. But if we in fact did so, could we walk out of the establishment under our own power? Would we be able to wake up the next morning to hunt? We were soon to find out.

After mere minutes of chomping away, this towering monument of food started to disappear...and fast. It's just too bad the napkin's proporations didnt match up. There were no clean hands or faces here.

After nearly 15 minutes the rate of chewing slowed, the stomach's filled -- we were indeed fighting a monster. The looks on our faces said it all.

I felt like a deer myself, continuously chewing the cud of this burger, waiting for the green light from my internal organs to eat more.

Chris and I looked at each other still with confidence, but now with a new pinch of disgust. We were already full, and we were going to eat it all.

And we did. After a half hour our plates were cleared of the $14 dinner.  It had become part of us now. "Ouch," I remember thinking.

That pain was temporarily submissed with the presentation of our trophy T-shirts. Yes, it was now all worth it. Free t-shirt. Chris did finish before me, but I truely believe it was my documentation of the event that allowed such to happen.

The lesson learned here is never give up despite how full of a greasy, fatty, brick-like burger your life becomes......... No. Actually, the real lesson here is to always show up your siblings despite how sick it makes you feel... And always eat your way to a free t-shirt.

Action from relaxation

I wear a cardigan. it's true. Sometimes I wear it when I parallel park my car on these congested streets, which is all too frequent. "Good job," my front bumper tells the back bumper.  It is a satisfying moment for the pair.

This is a cardigan sweater I obtained for a very small price, but have wore with very big pride.

There are days I wear the cardigan to walk downtown on a cool afternoon. My 100-percent acrylic mate does a good job averting the cool Puget Sound air. I like that.

While I play Pente, (here is a picture of it) I wear my warm friend. In this game, you have to get five of your marbles in a row. If you don't, you will die!  Ok, not really, but you will, at the very least, lose. I have no way of knowing the other circumstances of a possible death while you play. But, a meteor perhaps?
 
In my gray sweater, I drink a beer.  There was one time I even wore it instead of a bath robe to keep me warm in the morning.  Can you imagine? ... Please don't!

Watching football is much more comfortable with the snug of the gray sweater, just the two of us. Go Packers! He knows he isnt an attractive one, but that is fine.

It works well with jeans and works well with a tie.  Wear it as a second, or even, third layer.  "Thanks buddy," my shivering t-shirt says.

I do believe my cardigan led a life full of neglect prior to finding itself in my hands. I confess that I purchased the cardigan as a mockery to help a Halloween costume several years back, but I have learned, serendipitously, since then. Why would somebody rid themselves of such a delightful, and an even more helpful friend?

Thank you cardigan.

Serendiputous walks

I've become a walker... a pedestrian. Well, not that I wasn't walking before, but I know for a fact I prefer to walk. Sure these narrow concrete passageways lined with methodically used cars supposedly allow one to get from from Point A to Point B faster, but why choose that route as within the confines of a vehicle you cannot stop to enjoy the changing season, and the serendipitous images waiting to be captured.  Below you will see a wandering cat that followed us home a block after a certain walking partner of mine attempted an empathetic approach to it.

As a pedestrian, I have also been given the opportunity to absorb images I'm pretty sure too many Seattleans take for granted -- the basic neighborhood scenery. This is in fact the norm, and it is amazing.

And if you were disgusted, then you probably ignored it. If you are enticed, then here is the explanation -- Yes, that is a real spider. A big spider. It likes to call the front entrance to our building home, catching people's hair almost as often as it's actual dinner.

A dubious night through my window

Rain, sun, clouds. Thunderstorms, rain, clear skis. More flashes from the nebulous sky. Through my window I can see the wind has the trees fiercely waving at each other. It was even reported that we had 16 lightning strikes in the past half hour. Storm warnings have hit the television screen. I dare not leave my apartment into the subtle hell that is outside these walls.


Wait, who I am kidding?  I have Wisconsin blood! This so-called terror is simply frivolous, and has been taken advantage of by scavenging local news outlets.

What I learned:
This is yet another difference of what people are accustomed to here in the northwest. Counting lightning flashes?-- I think this Metallica album cover poses a bigger threat than did this night sky, but everybody learns something new everyday. right?

A colorful afternoon in the emerald city

Where green meets the concrete infrastructure - the continuing amazement of this city shines as brightly as ever during a November day.

Nearly 60 degrees and we ventured out of the apartment for the first time in what seemed like days during these slow-occupation-ridden moments of my infant days out west.

House by house, and tree by tree, we make our way up and down the hills of our neighborhoods, Taiece and I do, until something fierce hit the stomach of my girlfriend's stomach. Oh yes, it was hunger.

Being vegetarian, and having a vast array of such choices to choose from, Taiece suggests a small, vegetarian Asian-fusion lunch break.

I was excited, as I always am to try something new. The menu was plentiful, and specially in season as we started out with a pumpkin spring roll treat. This little friend packed as much pepper per square millimeter as I think I've ever had in two bites of food. Click on the photo and see for yourself. Overall I give it a 6.5 out of 10 on my taste chart mainly because, well, I'm just not that into pumpkin as a food.

Across the table, Taiece sat with her bowl of spicy hell in a bowl. Apparently, it was actually some sort of mushroom, tofu, ginger, bamboo and whatever else, stirred into one nicely made blue dish. Again, my tongue's dislike for ginger causes me to give this dish a mere 4 out of 10, despite the tasty after-zing it offered.

I ordered what seemed to be a basic "sweet and sour" chicken dish that, in fact, turned out to be fake chicken, cha-chicken, tofu chicken, whatever you want to call it. This surprise was unique, but good. The overall dish was a 6 out of 10 rating in overall taste. I think it's safe for me to say my first experience could have been better.

Leaving with extremely heavy stomachs, we continued our trek westward to the soaring skyline. On the way were marvelous views of the Olympics, the Space Needle, and a couple glimpses of the shimmering Puget Sound.

To our ease, this westerly walk is all downhill. The photos you see is down Denny Way, and for us, the main drive to downtown and other neighborhoods. Downtown is actually to the hypothetical left of these two snapshots.



Take a stroll down this hill with me.

|
|
|
\/

Ah, yes, and to the right is our gym, which...we...really try to ..get to ...reg..u..larly.

Getting back on track.

Downtown Seattle is full of buildings. The buildings are full of people and merchandise. It is this merchandise, mainly, that Taiece likes. Though I know she likes all people too.
We bounced around to several stores, and a bathroom break before heading on our two-mile trek home. Oh, yes, all up hill, requiring much more energy than we had at this point.

But, and not surprising to anyone but perhaps those goofy, hairy caveman from that insurance commercial, there are coffee shops in this city- several on every block, actually.

This visit however would not be for coffee, as it being mid-afternoon after a spicy Asian lunch just didnt seem like the right combination. So we re-entered our neighborhood with a fresh Italian soda and a cup of water.

Say hello to Capitol Hill.

Closer to home is one of a couple grocery stores, a drug store, and even more residential greens.  One of the main strips of Capitol Hill is 15th Street, where you can also find the local Safeway grocer.

The rest of the stride home was exhausting. Out of breath, sore legs, and a continued thirst took over this expedition. I still, however, had time to raise my camera.

Not only does this city do it the right way when it comes to incorporating the environment, but there is also an always entertaining mix of art..everywhere.  This is a corner never of before related objects pressed into concrete sidewalk working as, for many years to come, a companionship.

Simpler days

Sometime I wonder how much simpler it would be to live in the era we portrayed last Saturday night....

I think the 50s-style clothing we wore helped remind us of the forgotten simplicity of life, not that doing so was the plan.


We had some of Taiece's friends stop over for some snacks and drinks. Their costumes also happened to fit our temporarily reverted household.

Perhaps the most ironic part of the night was the bar we visited. After using the old black wall phone on the first floor to call up to the second floor, the secured door unlocked and we walked up a set of wooden stairs lined by old black and white photos of a mostly naked woman. When we hit the summit of our climb, we were here.

It was a very vintage, relax, and somewhat upscale bar that reminded me of a grandmother's front living room. It could have also been a secret floor for the mob.

The throw back easy-listening music was even set at a low volume making conversation as simple as drinking.
The seating area they put us in was right next to the stairway summit. Theories are that they put us here as temporary, living decor to fit the feeling of this upstairs bar. So i posed.

Later that night, upon our return home, I posed again. This time in in pre-1950s color t.v.

So did Taiece....





Happy Halloween.

Carving pumpkins never gets old...

....especially when the packers play the favre-ulous Viqueens!

The Rip City Experience

This past week[end] my car took me to Portland, OR. Through the city and past the volcanoes, it traveled south to the micro-beer haven.

About three hours south we traveled, Taiece and I, to visit her family. I even saw a familiar face- a old roommate, a friend.

Portland was comfortable. It reminded me much more of Milwaukee than does Seattle. It is smaller and less crowded. However I did spend most of my time in the suburb, so my view could be slightly skewed.

A couple highlights of this Milwaukee-Portland dual:

• Portland has a largely known, but almost seemingly cult-like, doughnut place called "Voodoo Doughnuts" HERE is a photo of one. The Bacon-topped pastry was my choice. For you sweets fanatics, this might have been your choice.
• I thought Milwaukee had a good beer selection. Well, Portland is the micro-brew capital, which includes micro-brews, brew pubs, and yes, even the cheap stuff.
• The public transportation option was really nice. Sprawling outward from the epicenter of downtown, this light rail mass transit is fast and easy to use as it runs right on the downtown streets. Why cant Milwaukee pull their heads of out each others butts and get working on something similar?

Last, but CERTAINLY not least was the hot, juicy, flavorful street-cart food I walked into with Collin and Taiece. It's a mini-world of ...world foods that sit on the street corner, each occupying it's own food cart. It looks like this at night.

Portland was fun. A great experience to build upon. It's now time to head back north and continue to discover Seattle's secrets.